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@ALBUM: Freak Show by the Residents

everyone comes to the freak show (3:59)
harry the head (2:54)
herman the human mole (3:57)
wanda the worm woman (4:34)
jack the boneless boy (5:53)
benny the bouncing bump (6:07)
mickey the mumbling midget (4:26)
lillie ? (6:56)
nobody laughs when they leave (5:50)

@SONG: Everyone Comes to the Freak Show

Hurry! Hurry! Hurry! Step right up and you will see on display
a collection of some of the strangest specimens ever gathered
together - both LIVE and preserved.
You will see the incredible JELLO JACK - the boneless boy and
HERMAN - The Human Mole.
You'll see WANDA - The Worm Woman and MICKEY - The
Mumbling Midget with his secret from far beyond the realm of
human understanding.
There's also Benny - Bouncing Benny The Bump who can't wait to
show you the eerie and shapeless mass which he hides beneath his
shirt and shows only when he does his famous dance -
THE BOUNCING BUMP!
So - step this way, folks come on in, you know you can't resist.
Come in and make your mundane lives look like the kiss of bliss.

Everyone comes to the Freak Show
To laugh at the Freaks and the Geeks
Everyone comes to the Freak Show
But nobody laughs when they leave.

Once a man exploded just before he went to sleep
When his wife awoke she found some fragments of his feet
She wondered what had happened but there was no mouth to say
Or lips to kiss or even any tears to wipe away.
She went to see a priest and asked if death could be much worse
Than knowing what was left of love would fit inside her purse.

Someone said that nothing hurts you
Like a vice without a virtue;
That may be but is it worse than
Life when it becomes so certain
That your eyes cannot be open

To the twisted and the broken?


@SONG: Harry The Head

The Head was hardly human
The head is finally dead
"I can live forever
In formaldehyde", he said.

Once he made me so mad
I knocked him on the floor;
He rolled around and found a
little paint brush
by the door;
As he held it in his teeth
he painted angels
On the skirt I wore.

Harry
Harry
Harry

Harry - The Head is dead.
Harry - The Head is dead.
Harry - The Head is dead.


Herman - The Human Mole

Herman
Herman
Herman isn't happy
Herman isn't well
Herman is an albino

Not that you could tell.

Herman
Herman
Herman is dirty
Herman is cold
Herman is thirty and
Wishes he was old

But he isn't.

Herman has a trailer
On top of it is grass
He filled the inside up with dirt
And made the sides of glass
He lets you climb the steps
Up to the top for free
And look down through a little hole
Above his old TV.

But if you want some more
You pay to go inside
The tent that goes around the trailer
In which Herman hides.

Herman plays piano
When no one is around
He has an upright baby Steinway
Underneath the ground.


@SONG: Wanda - The Worm Woman

Sneering at a leering lady
as she stares and squirms
At Wanda with her saintly smile
and living wig of worms
I like to watch their faces fall
as we disgust and shame them
Seeking suckers is my game
- no longer lion taming.

Like a pink and pregnant pumpkin
perched upon her neck
Wanda Wadkins head was hurting
it was bitten by insects
I watched the awkward way she waddled
walking to the pail
She always used to wash her worms
and clean beneath her nails
I love the soul I see inside her
but I just can't love her
Folding fat that rolls around
like bowling balls in butter.

@SONG: Wanda Wanda Wanda...

Watch me watch me watch me
Won't you watch me for a while
Watch me pick my worms up
And put them in a pile
Watch me sit upon it with
My Mona Lisa smile.

Why Wanda why, do I always watch you cry?


@SONG: Jello Jack - The Boneless Boy

Jello Jello Jello Jello Jello Jello...

Ho ho ho I'm Jello Jack the jolly boneless boy.
I live inside a jar beside the rooster boy named Roy.
They pour me out upon a platform and the people stare
At eyeballs in a pool of flesh surrounded by some hair.

I wish I was a cowboy or maybe just a bird
Singing simple melodies that no one ever heard
Soaring with the winter winds and bringing in the spring
Sharing air with orioles and bumblebees that sting
And making babies proud of all the bugs that I would bring.
I'd sit up high above the ground and laugh as I looked down
at all the silly humans as they slowly trudged around.

But as I see the end of evening turn into the night
The bird inside my brain becomes a light that is too bright.

In his dreams at night he hears a white hot light
And he knows that God is singing in his dreams at night.

Hot heat smolders smoking embers
Vibrate deep, vibrate deep
Cause teeth clinch, cause vibrate deep
Inside the sucking sound of suction,
Suction, sucking sections of my soul,
Sucking sections of the only thoughts
My mind will salivate and drool
And press against itself and press
Against itself and feel the cursing
Flow of fever, driven, biting, grinding, clinging,
Ream the center of the Sun
With shafts of Solid Steel
Know that there is nothing like the feeling
Of those steel fingers up inside
Of something sticky, sweet and wet
Feel the lips of licking licky wet liquid;
feel the tongue that touches the tips of sharp pointed things.


@SONG: Bouncing Benny

Seeing that his eyes were empty under half closed lids,
Made it all the more disturbing knowing Benny hid
A bump that looked like clods of dirt inside some sickly lung
That barely peeked beneath his shirt and twitched like Toto's tongue.

For fifty cents inside a tent adjacent to the rest,
The weaker soul could hide their eyes while Benny bared his chest;
He rubbed the bump with oleo and little bits of meat
And stroked the shape as it extended down towards his feet.

Bounce Benny bounce Bouncing Benny

He would put a record on then go into a trance
Until he heard his mother's favorite polka then he danced;
The record player went too fast but Benny didn't care,
He simply bounced around the room while people stood and stared.

Benny really only cared about one single thing -
He collected magazines called "Women in the Ring";
He kept them all in plastic bags and everybody said
That Benny talked to them at night before he went to bed.

Bounce Benny bounce Bouncing Benny

I need someone to wrestle with she'd have to wear a hood,
And hold me in a hammerlock if she was feeling good.
She'd probably have a ponytail that stuck out from the back
And I bet her eyes would shine - right when she attacked;
She might be kind of mean some times and act like we weren't friends,
But when the match was over we'd be buddies till the end;
I've got to go! I've got to go! I know that she is there -
Waiting in a ring for me to hug her like a bear.

Follow that dream Benny follow that dream...


@SONG: Mickey - the Mumbling Midget

Mickey the mumbling midget
was ten years old today
Mickey the mumbling midget
somehow ran away
Mickey the mumbling midget
was not in his cage
Mickey the mumbling midget
soon would need a shave

Lassie looked at something shapeless lying on the lawn
Scratchy at some scabby sores and stretching as it
yawned
It seemed to be uneasy as it looked up at the moon
She sensed the tension in the air and smelled a sweet
baboon.
Pungent was the warm aroma drifting in the air
She hoped he would smell her heat and lick her
silken hair.

Run Mickey run
Run Lassie


@SONG: Lillie

I saw a woman chewing with nothing in her mouth;
Her teeth were in her hands and her tongue was hanging out;
The she started drooling and caught it in a cup,
The cup was full of pennies; it spilled when she got up.

Some guy is in the shadows grabbing empty air;
He could be catching butterflies if there were any there.

All the freaks are not inside the tents
Some pay to come and be in the audience.

I saw a great big guy who had a little gun;
He pulled it out and smiled and then he sucked his thumb
His wife was standing by with a leather leash
Fastened to a child who cried beside their feet.

The scary one is back with clothes so white and clean;
And her face that's coated with a quarter inch of cream-cold cream

She's the one who freaks the freaks out
Lillie little Lillie, Lillie little Lillie, Lillie chilling Lillie
Lillie with her white face.
Delicate Lillie is stainlessly lonely and
She is too white
Like a face in a flashlight with teeth that might bite
She is too white
Like dice rolling snakeeyes in headlights at night
She is too white
Like a corpse in the sunshine or eyes in a fight

There's a spot a spot on my glove on my glove I know, no no maybe it
was make em runny make em runny honey... doilies doilies where have all
the doilies gone...
Roses will whither and die
Along with the lace and the lies
Nothing is nicer than death
At matching the bad and the best
Heh heh... he hated me he hated me and hate is white and hate is hot
but I'll not even have disdain for him not even a stain on a memory
looked up to, lacking all respect for him I'm blacking out the specks
of decent thoughts that linger in me and leave only white white
peaceful white calm white swans silently flying in the snow look down
and see the bleached bones of a noble knight who died trying to save
his lady his lovely white lady who brought her man milk in the
moonlight but it was too late too late too late he said
Scratch out all the pin holes
Open up the sores
Don't look out the window
White hatred's at the door.
And he tried to make me dirty make me dirty make me dirty.
Touch her someone
Touch her someone
Reach out to her
Touch her soiled soul.


@SONG: Nobody Laughs when they Leave

Everyone comes to the Freak Show
To laugh at the Freaks and the Geeks
Everyone comes to the Freak Show
But nobody laughs when they leave.

We are only equal in the grave and in the dark
Said a man whose head was halfway eaten by a shark
Now if you ask me why I would continue on like this
I doubt that I would know so I could only make a guess
Half a mouth may not be much but it's still half a kiss.

Everyone comes to the Freak Show
To laugh at the Freaks and the Geeks
Life is a lot like the Freak Show
Nobody laughs when they leave.