MATERIAL SAFETY DATA SHEET

 WOMAN        CHEMICAL ANALYSIS


 ELEMENT:     WOMAN
 SYMBOL:      WO2
 DISCOVERER:  ADAM
 ATOMIC MASS: Accepted as 118lb, but know to vary from 100 to 550lb.

PHYSICAL PROPERTIES

 1. Surface usually covered with powder or painted film
 2. Boils at nothing, freezes for no reason.
 3. Melts if given special treatment.
 4. Bitter if incorrectly used.
 5. Found in various states ranging from virgin metal to common ore.
 6. Yields to pressure applied gently to selected points.

CHEMICAL PROPERTIES

 1. Has a great affinity for Gold, Silver, Platinum and most precious stones.
 2. Absorbs great quantities of expensive substances.
 3. May explode spontaneously without prior warning, and for no known reason.
 4. Insoluble in liquids, but activity greatly increased by saturation in alcohol.
 5. Softens and takes on a rosy glow when soaked in hot water.
 6. Most powerful money reducing agent known to man.

COMMON USES

 1. Highly ornamental, especially in sports cars.
 2. Can be great aid to relaxation.

TESTS

 1. Pure specimen turns pink when discovered in natural state.
 2. Turns green when placed beside a better specimen.

HAZARDS

 1. Highly dangerous except in experienced hands.
 2. Illegal to possess more than one.